Saturday, June 21, 2008

What you missed by not being at my house today


Colin does this. Then I clean it up. In the process of my cleaning he makes ANOTHER mess. Naturally. I'm bent over cleaning that mess up and Raph walks over, hikes his leg, spreads his butt cheeks and farts in my general direction. W.T.F?
Later on the sprinkler guy comes over to turn on the sprinklers. He's very nice and Raph follows him all over and chatting incessantly. They guy has to replace some rubber things on the one thing that you turn the system on. (Clearly this is the first time I've ever had a sprinkler system.) Its right by our front porch and so Raph sits dangling his legs over the side asking him questions.
It goes something like this:
R: What's that?
SG: Its a ________. (remember I don't know jack about sprinklers)
R: Why are you here?
SG: B/c I'm the sprinkler guy.
R: Why are you the sprinkler guy?
SG: Its my job to fix sprinklers.
R: What are you doing?
SG: Fixing your sprinklers.
R: Why is that your job?
SG: B/c I didn't go to school.
R: You didn't go to school?
SG: No I didn't go to college so its my job to fix sprinklers.
::spray of water and Raph is distracted::
R: Why didn't you go to school?
Me::thinks how the hell do I make this line of questioning stop?! ::
::spray of water again::
R: That water scared me!
Colin: WWOOOOOOOOOOO- OWWWWWWWWWWW!!!
R: What are you doing?
SG: Trying to fix this part.
R: Don't break it.
SG: Believe me I'm trying not to. This thing costs more than I'm worth.
R: Yeah. I does.
::palm to forehead::

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