Friday, April 24, 2009

2 shots in the butt and a cup of coffee

That's how I started my day. This morning was the first time Mike gave me my weekly injection. I felt so official getting everything ready for him, alcohol wipes, little vials of medicine and syringes. I did everything like I was supposed to, cleaned the vial off with a wipe. Used the GIANT needle to draw the medicine. Swapped out the needles for the injection. Got out another wipe to clean my skin and handed the syringe to Mike.

"You remember how to do this?"

"Yeeeees, I remember."

He makes a big production of squeezing my skin to find just the right spot. Cleans my skin, takes the cap off the syringes with his teeth like he's an old pro and then...


"Oh sorry."

He just stabbed me like he was playing darts in a bar! He then stabs me again and starts to give me the injection. The medicine is oil based so its thick and you have to give the injection very slowly to reduce the pain and potential swelling afterwards. He slooooowly starts putting the medicine in my body. It stings so I ask,

"Are you doing it slowly?"

"YES, I'm doing it just like she said to."

I start to feel woozy. And ask him how much is left.

"About a quarter, do you want me to do it fast?"

"NO! But I feel like I'm going to pass out!"

I start to get that ringing in my ears, get sweaty and my vision starts to blur.

As soon as he's finished I have him help me to the couch where everything goes dark. I did not actually pass out but came very close. That was fun. As I lay there sweating on the couch Mike tells me, "That is soooo not what I had in mind when playing doctor."

Smart ass.

He looks nice enough doesn't he?

Sunday, April 19, 2009

As smooth as a gravel road

My Raph. Bless him. He has no idea what he's saying sometimes but its so funny all the same.
Last night after dinner Colin was blowing raspberries on my belly and Raph calls from across the room, "Whoa Mommy! Your belly is so huge!" Then he comes over to me and lifts my shirt and says, "Oh man, your that is so fat!" Sigh.

That reminds me of the day I came home from the hospital after having Colin. It had been hard on Raph having mommy be gone for so many days and he was all snuggered up with me in the rocker.

"Mommy. Did they take the baby out of your tummy?"

"Yes honey, he's still at the hospital remember?"

"Then why is your tummy still so big?"

That's bold. He's got a way with the ladies and is about as smooth as a gravel road.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

20 questions with Raph about Mommy

1: What is something Mommy always says to you?
Raph: I'm your little baby.

2: What makes Mommy happy?
R: I think I'm doing a good job

3: What makes Mommy sad?
R: When we aren't doing a good job.

4:How does Mommy make you laugh?
R: Tickles me.

5.What was Mommy like as a little girl?
R: You can play (yeah he didn't get this question)

6: How old is Mommy?
R: I don't know.

7. How tall is Mommy?
R: Almost 50 lbs (Is that good or bad?)

8.What is Mommy's favorite thing to do?
R: Call us your little babies. (I must say this a lot)

9: What does Mommy do when you aren't around?
R: You wait until I come back.

10:If Mommy was to become famous, what would it be for?
R: Help around a little bit more (Huh?)

11: What is Mommy really good at?
R: Helping putting Colin to bed.

12: What is Mommy not very good at?
R: Turning on the wrong shows.

13: What does Mommy do for work?
R: Make money. I don't know how to make money.

14: What is Mommy's favorite food?
R: A Bowl of soup. Do you like soup?

15: What makes you proud of your Mommy?
R: You change Colin's stinky diapers to not stinky diapers.

16:If Mommy was a cartoon character who would she be?
R: Someone on Imagination Movers (Not a cartoon but that's ok. I guess that means I'm Nina)

17: What do you and Mommy do together?
R: We snugger together.

18: How are you and Mommy the same?
R: We feel the same

19: How are you and Mommy different?
R: We don't feel different.

20: How do you know Mommy loves you?
R: Because I snugger with you.

Friday, April 10, 2009

The day that wouldn't end

Ever have one of those days that just would NOT end. You look up at the clock and its only 1:10pm and your head promptly explodes? I had that day last week.
I woke up on my typical Wednesday at home. I got up with Raph and had some coffee. Colin wakes up a short time later and seems to have woken up with the angst and anger of a 13 year old girl. He promptly throw a tantrum while he's still in his crib because I was not Daddy. After going through the pantry he says NO to everything then settles on whatever the first thing I offered him. He continues to cry and wail over pretty much everything.

I go to take a shower because I have an *emergency* worked me in first thing in the morning OB appointment. I get the boys ready, stash a snack in my bag and a couple toys and we go to the OB's office. Normally I never bring the boys with me to such appointments but it was a. an *emergency* appointment and b. first thing in the morning so I'd be in and out right?
I get to the doctor's office and we move to our room and the nurses seem slightly confused. "Are you here for just your injection or are you seeing the doctor?" Yes I'm seeing the doctor, but it seems he's in surgery...still. I go into my room and wait with 2 small boys. I get weighed and nearly cry, then shuffle the boys into the 4' by 4' bathroom. The questions begin, "Mommy why are you peeing in a cup?" Sigh. After explaining why I peed in a cup we leave and go back to our room. The boys start playing with the exam table and the stirrups that are attached. Raph then asks what they are. Greeeeeaaaat now I have to explain stirrups. See why you must NEVER bring a 5yr old and a 2yr old to an OB's office? They ask questions you don't want to answer and fight over who gets the rolling stool. Loudly. For an hour and half.

The only high point for the boys was watching while I got a shot in my butt. What more could a little boy ask for than watching Mommy get a the BUTT? That's good stuff right there.

I meet with the doctor and the boys were generally agreeable with an audience. Raph got to put the jelly on my belly so that the doppler would work and we listened to the baby's heartbeat. The doctor tells me when I can come back for my next injection. I said we were planning on having Mike trained to give them to me at home. He says, "Oh, if that's what you want to do we will just make sure that he knows what to do if you start bleeding or hit a bone." Wait, WHAT? Hit a bone! Yeah I have to rethink this whole Mike giving me injections again. They never talked about hitting bones before. We said good bye and will see them again next week for my shot in the butt. The delight in Raph's eyes was hard to conceal.

After having been in the OB's office for 2 hours at this point Colin has had it. We are walking out to the parking lot and I'm holding his hand. He gets mad and drops to the ground and starts screaming. I think, "Wow that's a little dramatic." And then notice he's really really crying, not just mad. His lips are turning blue because he's crying so hard and he's not moving his left arm. Shit I just dislocated my baby's elbow.
I pick up Colin and take him to my car and set him in his car seat gingerly. He says, "Dat." and holds his elbow. My heart then breaks in half. Poor baby is so very hurt and I was an active participant in him getting there. In an attempt to protect my unborn baby and making Colin walk...I hurt Colin.
I'm at a hospital so I can take him around the corner to the ER but call my peds office instead. They said, "Yep you dislocated his elbow. Hold on just a second." They come back and have me come in to the office in an hour and 15 minutes. So what do I do until then? I have a hurt baby who is fine as long as he does not move his arm but I have to keep him that way for over an hour? I contemplate the ER but who knows how long you'd have to wait. I move Colin's arm to strap him into his car seat and he starts screaming again. I feel horrible because I'm causing him more pain but he has to be strapped in.

I know both boys are starving so we head home. I call Mike to tell him what happens and he says, "I would have let him drop." Thanks. That's helpful. Fortunately Colin falls asleep in the car. At home Raph and I have a picnic on the floor near the car and let Colin sleep. When it was time to go we get in the car and Raph says, "NOW MOMMY. BE VERY QUIET SO WE DON'T WAKE UP COLIN OK?!" Colin's eyes pop open, he moves his arm and starts screaming again. Thanks Raph.

At the doctor's office we sign in and Colin plays with the other kids like he normally does, except this time he has one dangling arm. It breaks my heart all over again to see that dangling, useless limb. He moves it now and then and cries. One of the partners in the practice sees us instead of our regular ped. I know him from the boys' school and we see him quite often and pick up and drop off time and when my ped is sick or on vacation. He calls us into his office, I tell him what happened and he holds Colin's tiny arm and wiggles it around until he says, "Done." Colin is, of course, screaming but his arm works. We go back to the waiting room to let him calm down before checking his range of motion. As we are leaving the doctor says, "Oh this must be your day off." Yeah...some day off.

Colin is fine, fighting with Raph and playing with the other kids. His range of motion is fine and you'd never know his arm had been dangling uselessly 10 minutes earlier. We get in the car and go home. I had packed up some "lunch" for Colin and he eats for the first time in hours.

Did I mention the injection I got in the morning? It was progesterone which is a natural sedative. At this point it has kicked in fully and my eyes feel like they are full of grit because I am so tired. I glance over at the clock and its only 1:10 pm.

I get the boys home and feed them. I tell Raph he has to take a nap. I feel like I'm walking in quicksand as I put Colin in his crib. He resists and is screaming. I walk Raph to his room and he says, "I hate this day." Preaching to the choir buddy. I get Raph in his bed and listen to Colin crying. He had to sleep because I so very much needed to rest. For an hour he cries, whines and plays in his crib before falling asleep. I settle into the couch with my sore butt and dose off. Not long after that Raph wakes up and gets under the blankets with me.

I had planned on going to the grocery store but when was there time for that? I had an *emergency* appointment, explained peeing a cup, shot in the butt, dislocated my baby's elbow, got it relocated, napped and Colin had to be woken up at 5:30pm. I was so tired I could barely move and I had officially gotten NOTHING done. I called Mike and had him bring food home for dinner and was asleep on the couch before the boys went to bed. I just wanted that day to be over, start again and have a complete do over. Maybe the next week would be better....