Tuesday, July 21, 2009

My New Normal

The statement "Everything is relative" has never been truer. A friend once told me that my normal is someone else's screwed up reality. This is a fair assessment and I'm ok with that. I have overcome a milestone with this pregnancy...accepting my new normal. My new normal is that I feel exactly the way I did when I went into preterm labor with the boys...every.single.day. I have come to terms with this new normal. Its ok to have regular contractions every 3 minutes. Its ok to have cramping and pressure associated with said contractions. That's just how it is now.

I had a similar problem with Colin's pregnancy. My new normal of the third trimester was spontaneous bleeding. It just became my new normal. I had been check into the hospital and monitored. Checked in my OB's office and checked again. Everything was fine, there was no catastrophic cause for my bleeding and they actually couldn't even figure out why I was bleeding. All they knew was that it wasn't doing any harm. I had to accept this fact and just deal with it.

Here I am again, just dealing with these symptoms that would make a normal person surpass me in the frequent flyer status. Surely they would be knocking on the hospital door at least once, sometimes twice a day. Oh and my new normal includes the lobster leg effect. That's charming, no? Whatever, that will stop soon enough.

Here's another little bit of normalcy to adjust to these days. Raph is on vacation without us. Lucky boy got a trip with Nana and his cousin Jenna to Yellowstone. I talked to him on the phone and it was a typical stream of consciousness conversation. The only difference was instead of talking about cartoon characters and friends from school it went something like this, "Hi Mommy! Today we went on a stagecoach ride, and then we saw a black bear AND a grizzly bear. Later on I plan on seeing a gray woof. Tomorrow we are going on David and Betty's boat and then we get to go on top of a mountain. There was ice cream but I couldn't eat it because it had cow milk in it. Oh and we saw a moose......" My favorite part of that conversation was that he talked about a stagecoach ride in the most nonchalant way and he planned on seeing a gray woof. There was no doubt in his voice that he wouldn't see that woof. (He did see it by the way)

Jenna and Raph on the first day of their adventure standing in front of the Grand Tetons.

Meanwhile back on the home front, Colin is an only child. Once he got over the initial blow of being left behind he started to see the benefits of being the only kid in the house. He has been so snugly and sweet and fully enjoying our undivided attention. He does ask every day where Nana and Raph are but only in a fact finding mission, not in a real worried kind of way. He's taken up residence in Raph's seat at the dinner table, gets to read Elmo and Eric Carl books all day, and gets to pick which cartoons are on TV. Ahhh the good life.

I will say this is a nice calm before the storm. Raph comes home today and I will resume my roll as a very pregnant mother of 2 boys. Next week I go back to my doctor and assuming things have remained static I will breath another sigh of relief...if not I will panic and eat mass quantities of ice cream. I've already turned in my official letter of resignation at work and now I have an end in sight. I realized yesterday that I will only have, at most, FIVE more butt shots left! That's just one little vial! Yippee!! Sometimes its the little things. See, that is so not everyone else's normal. I'm excited at the prospect of *only* five more shots to the rear. I think Mike will miss those shots...

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