Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Anticipation is a bitch

There is something magical about Christmas. Once a child reaches a certain age they totally *get* Christmas. They know its coming, they know what's coming and nearly pee their pants daily with anticipation. It is very exciting to think about a little fat man bringing you toys while you sleep. Its almost too much to handle. It is fun to witness the enthusiasm that children have towards this all too often hectic holiday.

There was a period of time where I didn't much care for the social parts of Christmas. When you are in college or grad school its more about the time off from your studies than anything else. But when you have kids everything changes (duh). The shocking delight on Christmas morning when they don't yet understand. Then the hints of comprehension that come the next year. Then by the time they are three all gloves are off and they start making lists in July.

With the grade school set they are more skeptical of the stories about Santa. They hear rumors that he might not be real and those little wheels start spinning. I can tell that Raph doesn't want to believe Santa isn't real BUT he does have lots of questions. He discusses the logistics of it all ad nauseam. He's so excited that he can barely contain himself but then he worries about leaving out the wrong type of cookies for Santa. He told me the "Santa" we saw at the children's museum was fake and he could always tell which ones were fake. He told me all the reason he felt this man was a fraud...in a very hushed whisper. He has been so very polite that you know he's throwing out an extra "Merry Christmas" to strangers just in case he's teetering on the verge of the naughty list.

Likewise, all this build up makes them slightly more insane than usual. There have been more than a few screaming matches between the boys involving who is and is not on the naughty list. Usually someone ends up coming to me in tears asking if they are on the naughty list. If its between the hours of 3 and 6 pm then I'd usually say yes. I think those arsenic hours are the worst time of day for our house and its best if they just leave the judging out of my hands.

We first noticed a problem with Raph a few years ago. His behavior takes a nose dive right before major holidays or his birthday. He has so much bottled up excitement that he doesn't know how to appropriately channel it. The end result is an overly emotional child that can be happily talking one minute and a puddle of sobbing tears the next. He has little patience for his siblings and does NOT wait for things at all. This year is a mixture of the good excitement and the bad excitement explosiveness. I think he's getting better but not entirely. Colin is just purely explosive and nothing else. I'm not sure if that's just his everyday behavioral train wreck or the usual with some extra Christmas specialness. Its hard to say but if Christmas doesn't happen soon I'm liable to just go postal. My normal resting blood pressure is about 58 over 89. Its crazy low. But most of today I'm fairly certain I've been hypertensive.

OMG I just had an aneurysm... Colin just woke up Heidi. I am on the verge. It wasn't bad enough that he was a maniac at the doctor's office today, in the grocery store and over flowed a toilet in the bathroom causing water to pour into the air vent and Heidi poured a bottle of body wash out in the hallway. My house now smells like said body wash and its giving me a migraine.

Please Santa, I'm trying to be good but these hellions are making me very very naughty. Heidi's next word might start with an f and end with an uck. Oh and the kids been off school for a full week before Christmas is bullshit.

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